Saturday, July 4, 2009

So I gained...

for the first time since I started WW. And I have to say it, I was PISSED. Seriously, I was only up .6 lbs, which I know seems like such an insignificant amount to be upset over, but I felt horrible. While I was sitting there trying not to cry waiting for the meeting to start, I thought of why it bothered me so much.
I was not expecting it, at all! Other weeks, I was for sure I was going to gain. But not this week. I didn't think I was going to lose a lot, but at least lose. I had some bad eating days over the weekend but I thought I made up for it in the gym. I worked out hard every single day, walked to work, and got to the gym at 8 a.m. (after leaving the gym at midnight the night before) to run 2 miles/embarrass myself in S&R/sit in the sauna to sweat as much as possible before weighing in. Ugh, I could have slept in! But most of all I was upset because I let my guard down. Just when I started to think I could finally see a difference, the scale humbled me real quick. This isn't a bad thing, just how I am. That's my subconscious's way of telling me I need to focus. And that has to start with Tracking much better.

As you can tell from this and my last post, I have been so emotional lately. I think maybe just because I've been feeling a little forgotten lately. But that's probably my fault, I let people forget about me. But I suppose that is just another part of the process to work on.

I most likely will not make my birthday goal weight, but hopefully it comes soon after. My new birthday goal is shorts! I think I mentioned earlier that I haven't worn a pair on non-basketball shorts in ...umm...half of my life! I'm really hoping to find a cute pair in the next few weeks and feel comfortable enough to wear them on my birthday. I know that sounds so lame, but it's a start.

I'm not really fashion-minded, but even today when I went to Forever 21 with my neice I saw all these cute clothes that I really liked. Before I would have thought I could never fit into anyhting. Now I think I eventually will, but I'll probably never pull any of those little low cut or spaghetti strapped tops off. It's just not me. I'm such a jeans and t-shirts type of girl and I like that. But there are ways I can pick up my style, like this little thing that I might be buying tomorrow. Speaking of tommorrow, I'm hoping to have a NSV to make me feel better. My mom said she would take me shopping for new jeans and all I'm hoping is that some size 14 or 15s fit because the 16/17s I have are too baggy.

Last but certaintly not least, I wanted to thank Jess @ Losing More Than My Mind. I was so honored to get a shout out on her post today. She's an awesome young and fabulous (WW) blogger and super inspirational. I'm so excited I came across her blog!

I definatley need to step up my blog game. I'm genuinely going to try to post better entries and more often. Overall, I'm just really glad that I finally committed to blogging. Just reading other people consistantly has been such a huge help. :]

Grace and Peace, y'all.


Jess said...

That first-ever gain is a KILLER. I was soooo afraid to gain, but when I gained for the first time I expected it; it wasn't so hard. But I can't imagine what you're going through.

I remember you saying you have been an athlete all your life: are you working out a LOT more than you used to? Or have you kicked up the workouts just very, very recently? If you've been doing strength or resistance training, you may have just gained muscle. It happens. Try taking your measurements to see if you've shrunk at all.

The scarf is super cute! Go for it :)

I hope you can make your birthday goal weight, but don't be too upset if you don't. I reached my birthday goal three months after my birthday! Hopefully you're way more focused than me :)

Just remember that a .6 gain is NOTHING. It's a drop in the bucket, really. And I'm sure you'll have a huge loss next week due to all your fabulous exercise efforts. Keep on keepin' on, girl.

John said...

Don't think so much!First off all the person who accept own faults will never fail in life sure!So please don't worry and be on your exercise and diet,you will have success on the way soon!
dsi xl